Love. Delusion?

“What is love anyway, does anybody love anybody other way”

There is no way to define love, each person will experience this most talked about emotion differently. There can be no definite set of words that will equally apply to everyone who experiences this emotion once or more in their lifetime. The most talked about human trait, the most touted of feelings; love can be easily confused with infatuation, flirtation, lust and awe/curiosity. Does that mean all these emotions are not love, and love in its essence is a holier more sacred emotion?

For simplicity’s sake, let’s divide love in two. There is the love for one’s family, country, religion /beliefs. Love is a learned behavior in this context, a child that has been cared for by a set of individuals will love them back, the child will have a bond with the surroundings that it grows in, naturally attached to its native environment; hence love for the land and finally, the beliefs that it sees its elders practice and preach. All of the above are broad generalizations, with many exceptions to the rule.

Here I talk about romantic love, love that a human being may experience in the course of  a lifetime .We understand and love differently as a teenager, for us the idea of being in love is more romantic than whatever the relationship may be. Just the very notion of someone being attracted to us makes us feel giddy and important. We are conscious of our looks and others and what it may mean to the person who fancies us. In our twenties it starts to take a more mature form, taking into consideration other variables such as understanding and interests, still even if we hold the question of age as constant can we absolutely conclude on the love delusion? For Love is notorious for clouding ones judgment, we see what we want to see and believe nothing else.

Fancy is a great word; though under-utilized in describing our attractions. I believe most of the times we just fancy one person or another. Most times we imagine or fancy that our life could be perfect if a certain someone is a part of it. We may fancy a person who is in a position of power, better looking, popular or wealthy. We can justify all these to be true love. This feeling is very fleeting and the object of our fancy can readily be replaced. This emotion is not the kind of love that we are talking of here; though it could be called its shallow younger sister.

It may happen that you meet someone and an instant light bulb goes off. At other time it is after many encounters that one qualifies to the level of love. But I believe that before we become conscious of someone’s importance in our life, a click happens in our brain and something deep inside not only hears it but responds to it. I believe that we all act as receivers and transmitters of signals. We fall in love every time we get a frequency match. How that happens, are there some specific codes that we unconsciously follow, I am sure. Human beings are an energy form, the reason we get attracted to the same kind of people over and over is part of the genetic code that we are emitting.  

A person walks in the room and instantly you get a negative vibe from him/her, you decide in the blink of an eye whether you like that person or not. The rationale behind this may be very complex and may take painful psychological evaluation but people like Malcom Gladwell, writer of the famous book Blink and the Tipping Point suggest that our core programme sifts through lot of information in a matter of seconds and presents us with a verdict.

The first instant that you hear a bing, the first thought that comes in your head is almost always correct, till we start coloring it with our own preconceived notions, our prejudices and align it with our conditioning. Our prejudices of race, color, ethnicity and worldly placement are not featured in this ancient processor that we carry. There is a theory that all souls in this world were made on a single day and that they appear in this world at different times. Scientifically that seems correct; the universe cannot hold another iota of matter, we keep recycling from one form of matter to another, so it seems highly plausible that we are all connected in a way that even science has not been able to tap. The entire universe comprises of one single soul and with some souls we have an ancient bar code that bing’s when we are near them.

I believe it is possible to sometimes meet one, sometimes more of the people who carry the same code. Our intensity of feeling with each will differ widely due to the worldly connection and considerations that we all experience. What we decide to do with each specific encounter is our choice and free will; but love for me is not a delusion ; rather a matter of frequency.